it’s been quite a while since I’ve posted. I just haven’t felt into it, which I was hoping wouldn’t happen this time around with blogging. maybe it’s the fact that I’ve actually started therapy (yay!) and I actually get along with my therapist and I don’t feel judged so I’ve been venting to her and working on things. or maybe its because I’ve been ignoring my feelings on writing when I feel the need by doing something around the house or with izzy. i’m not sure. but here I am.
things are going..well I suppose. my bills are all paid up to date, which is extremely rare. izzy is almost done with preschool, even though he will be going into the same program for another full year since he’s only gotten 2 months of it this school year because we started late. m’s job is stressful but hes thriving. and i’m alive. I guess that’s all I can ask for right now. I will always wish things were better. you know.. more money, better house, better cars..but we’re making everything we have right now work for the best that we can. a girl can always have her dreams. I just wish I could learn to stop comparing my life to my “friends”. m tries as hard as he can to keep reminding me not to do that, but I feel like he doesn’t understand why i’m so hard on myself about things like that.
I need to learn how to focus. I had a million things on my mind that I was going to talk about when I signed in to this today, and I’ve lost it all from my brain. I guess i’ll try again later…
anxiouslynicole 